Breaking: Bill O’Reilly appointed Minister of Sexual Education by Trump

NN reports –

Hot off North Korea, the Trump administration has renewed its policy political aggression. Filibustered by Democrats in the Senate, Republicans responded by once again shitting on the legislative process. Unlike the Trumpcare fiasco, it seems now the party has finally gotten its act together.

The coup d’etat now being dubbed O’Really?Gate occured late last night. At whatever the hell time Netflix uploads new Riverdale episodes, the Night owl-in-chief struck. Blasting off a a tweet faster than he finger-blasts new White-House interns.

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#Politicking

A mad scramble to reach Democratic members of congress ensued. Constituents called, texted, and even Skyped their representatives and known affiliates. Maxine Waters was reached with just 7 minutes of the ultimatum remaining. She then spent 5 minutes putting in her weave. Fumbling to create a twitter account the congresswoman was locked out her iPhone after forgetting her pin. Fuck.

Unpaid political analyst have confirmed the legality of the move. Trump’s team is said to be relying on section 10 Code§ 920 – Art. 120 of the bro code. In it, it states that if one member of a political encounter doesn’t exactly deny a proposal from another, then the proposing party is free to hit it. Proceed. Especially when the proposing party paid for the popcorn and everything. Democrats are expected to challenge the appointment in Supreme Court. Experts say that even if they are successful, they will all probably have to change districts.

Donald Trump Addresses GOP Lincoln Day Event In Michigan
Don’t ask, do tell

Within hours O’Rilley was confirmed at a ceremony at Pennsylvania State. His first motion was to declare consent optional within the workplace. Feminists organizations were quick to flip shit as they do. O’Rilley then agreed that the bill could use “some work” and implemented a single provision. The amendment makes it clear consent should only be needed when speaking to a superior. Those who would like to engage in sexual activity with a subordinate are all good.

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